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Carbohydrate Delirium: This Is What It Looks Like

by 33 Comments

I am a stunt woman. Don’t try this at home.

This is the like the Bermuda Triangle of dangerous eating pleasures. If you gaze into the picture, I appear to have some issues. I used to have a problem, but not anymore. You’ve gotta believe me, people… you believe me, right?

I am a reformed! The picture-image above is merely a public service re-enactment into that serious condition known as Carbohydrate Delirium…[insert mystery music of horror here].

It took me four long years to realize bready carbs don’t mesh with losing weight and looking slim. Not only did excessive carbohydrate chewing ruin my night of love, but it continuously left me bloated, and feeling heavy and comatose.

Too many carbs in general is obviously not good for you, but those damn refined flour carbs are the worse culprits of all; like delectable French Breads (Ooo!), Ciabatta rolls (Ahh!) and garlic breads (Ohh!).

Perhaps a visit to the low carb forum could have set me straight long ago, but my hardheaded azz had to learn it the hard way – by eating the crap day in and day out, until I finally realized how it affected my body and energy.

It’s been some time since I first banished the Carbohydate Delirium outta my life. I’ve been chewing in moderation for a good while now. And 99% of the time it’s the whole grain kinda carb.

I’m not bloated anymore! I can button my pants closed!

So what about YOU? How did your own carbohydrate revelation come about? Or are you still chewing on every carb in sight?

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Filed Under: Eat Right

Speak Your Mind!

  1. Ufff, Josie, I know what I wnat to write as a comment but I’m not sure if I should… but I’m gonna do it anyway, because that’s the kind of rebel that I am.

    I’m talking from the Primal Blueprint book-thinghy and the Paleo Solution book.thingy. And my own experience.

    Carbs? Are good. After a weight-lifting workout. Bad stuff that cames with carbs? They’re in the bran of rice, the skin of potatoes and corn. Accordind to the book-thingies I mention.

    Those guys say that is not the carbs that makes you feel bad, but the chemicals (natural, yet still chemicals) that grains put in them to stop animals to eat them. Think…. gluten.

    So maybe rice is not that bad, white rice is just sugar. If you’re a typical dude/gal, overweight, it’s bad. If you just came home from an exhausting weight liftig session, well, it might be good for you.
    I don’t want to start another “I’m a paleo zealot so you must do what I say” thread and discussion but, just saying (and with this, betrying all paleo belief) carbs are not bad for ya, after a demanding workot. But, in moderation.

    I have no problem (digestively) with rice or potatotes, but with gluten I do. I’ll spare you the ugly details. Let’s just say I feel really sleepy want like a fart when I do get carns from gluten. I never felt that way before going paleo… NO, actually, I nver realized that was the cause why I felt asleep in the couch before going paleo.

    Ok, my 0.02—-

    Reply

    • I never understood primal untkl you just broke it down, but based on what you’re saying, primal isn’t for me. White flour carbs are the ones that get me everytime. Statchy potatoes, corn, brown rice, etc – that’s still natural and doesn’t affect me. It’s the fined crap that bloats – white rice. White pasta. White flour. Eww

      Reply

      • @Josie, well, it might not be “the white stuff”. But the dozen of bi-carbo-nitrite-addedasapreservative-crap.

        But who knows! For all I know, all my paleo talking comes from my butt =D I don’t have a degree on this, and my favorite quote is “Whatever works for you!”

        Reply

  2. It’s not the carbs I have to avoid so much as the high sodium in the processed types of bread – but they are so, so flipping goood.  Want.  Picture is cracking me up.

    I have a friend coming for Christmas who doesn’t eat sugar, flour and something else [can’t remember right now] but I am worried about what I can’t fix now.  EEeek!

    Reply

      • @Josie,  Thank you so much for the suggestions Josie – but you realize this kills my holiday menu, right?  Hee hee.

        I do like your ideas tho’ – I will have something for our guest to eat….he is pretty easy going, all things considered – but he has kept me from a holiday ham for years.  He is the kids’ Jewish uncle.  My church was THRILLED [natch] when we picked him as Wallene’s godfather.  Yeah.  We don’t go there anymore. 😀

        All things aside if I give him a popsicle and a fruit cup the man will be happy. ;D

        Reply

  3. I’m another Primal Blueprint person: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/

    I’m not hard-core about it, but the number one thing I avoid is grains, particularly wheat. That’s made the biggest impact on my health. The only time I break that rule is when someone gives me home-made cookies or cake. 

    Reply

    • I jinxed myself. My husband is a letter carrier and brings home all sorts of goodies from his customers during the holidays. You would not believe the stuff he’s been bringing home all week. Here’s the list from just yesterday:

      1 pound of See’s candy
      1 pound Starbucks coffee
      1 jar homemade wine jelly
      1 bottle Bailey’s Irish Creme
      1 plate homemade cookie assortment: pin-wheels, rum balls, peanut-butter blossoms and something rolled in powdered sugar
      1 tin homemade chocolate chip cookies

      Needless to say, I was helpless in the face of the cookies, and my digestive tract feels totally grosso right now.

      Reply

  4. I used to have a heavy thing for carbohydrates, too, until I stopped dieting and decided to live healthily and not just skinnily. Suddenly, when it wasn’t “forbidden” anymore, I wasn’t as inclined to crave it. I do love my grains, but only the fiberlicius ones. Hearty oatmeal cookies, bran-filled rolls, flax seed pancakes…of course I do like my refined sweets during the holiday season, but otherwise things like white bread don’t fill me up and make me a little sick because it makes me remember my binging days.

    Reply

  6. Uh, I’m still eating them and feeling nasty but that never seems to stop me. Thanks for the reminder though. Maybe I’ll cut down in 2011…………….

    Reply

  7. DAYUM, Look at you tearin’ into that bread! If you’re eyes were rolled back in your head, it’d look like a picture from Shark Week!

    I love bread, but have found some good alternatives. Orowheat sandwich thins are awesome. And being in TX, we love our tortillas. The local grocery store makes them fresh daily. The whole wheat ones are incredible, and a very good alternative to the standard flour tortillas.

    Reply

  8. I am not a low carb person but I so stay away from the white breads & sugar type stuff. I do have to control the types of carbs & how much I eat but I just am not that low carb person. I have found a way to fit the foods in I like in a healthy way… it is give & take & compromise.. like a marriage! Not gonna give up bread.. but I did cut way way back on bagels & substituted for healthier breads that work better for me & as I age, the more this becomes important.

    Reply

  10. I like carbs. But I do try to eat less white, refined stuff. My whole family except my brother switched over to wheat/whole grain bread when I was still a kid. Even my super picky sister. It just tastes better (and of course its healthier too!). Now that he’s an adult, I bet my brother switched too. The only thing I always eat white is rice. Brown rice is hard to cook well. And I love white rice. I tried eating less carbs some years ago, and it actually made me very irritable and depressed. You did NOT want to be around me. I guess I need the endorphins carbs provide.

    Reply

  11. Carbs, smarbs! LOL! I’m a pasta girl but I’ve switched from white to whole wheat and eat them in moderation. I love bread and butter but kicked them to the curb years ago.

    Oh, and the picture is classic.

    Winks & Smiles,
    Wifey

    Reply

  12. Hormones did me in carb-wise. I just can’t eat too much of them without feeling icky sicky and so I don’t. I can have them in moderation and earlier in the day. If I have too much (and “too much” is lot different than it was a couple of years ago) after, say 7 p.m., I can’t sleep and have panic-attacks in the middle of the night. No thank you! And so basically, I don’t even crave them any more!

    Reply

  13. Haha just read the carbs ruined your night of love! HA HA HA HA!!!

    Yeah I’ve found that carbs are my downfall b/c I cannot stop myself! Cakes, cookies, you name it. It’s the white stuff that gets me and then I’m a bump on a log later! Must limit them!

    Reply

  14. ::sigh:: I really enjoy carbs…I can’t shake them…but now I make sure they’re whole wheat or whole grain…I’m sure the photo in this post will pop up in my head everytime I reach for a piece of bread! Thanks! lol

    Reply

  15. I almost managed to stay off bread this whole year, until a few weeks ago, when I ate so many sandwiches that I might as well have not bothered! I definitely felt the weight of my decision though, when I got that horrid bloated feeling afterwards (which didn’t stop me going for another sarnie though…)
    I’m not off all carbs – bread was just my main vice so was trying to cut that out, and after my recent lapse, I think I will try again!! Hungry Jenny x

    Reply

  16. I know that lots of people disagree and think a calorie is a calorie…but I am with you on this one. That bready carb thing and I do not get along well.

    Reply

  17. When in doubt, I usually reach for a carbohydrate to satisfy me. They are easy to eat quickly, you know when you can open a bag of pretzels, crackers or chips.
    Bad idea! I know if I quit eating so much sugar and carbs it would help me lose a few lbs………..

    Reply

  18. Not all calories are created equal. And I doubt too that losing or gaining weight is solely about calories in/calories out. It’s always more complicated.

    The one thing we do know is that high carb foods prevent us from losing weight and often cause us to gain it. I have had client after client tell me they are eating the way they should for weight loss but when I look at their food log it is filled with bagels, sandwiches, and even potatoes.

    These foods are ok to eat in moderation if you are at your ideal weight but one will never reach their weight loss goals eating a hoagie. No matter what Jared says.

    Reply

  19. I lost 100 lbs not worrying about carbs. I don’t feel any better or worse eating white bread than I do whole grain. I feel HORRIBLE if I don’t get a side of grains at all (I tried months of giving up carbs and it never got better). The only difference I notice is that the brown stuff keeps me full longer, so most days I stick to it, but not always.

    My body is very sensitive to other things – I can’t do coffee or I’m a bloat monster. I can’t do caffeine at all or I’m just a hyper monster. If I go a day without eating veggies I feel horrid. I try to stay away from sugar and sweets. Fatty meat makes me gag and feel awful. However, you can pry my bread, noodles, and rice from my cold, dead hands.

    Reply

  23. hhhaha funny picture. i adore carbohydrates, my favorite nutrient, lol. but i do try to always eat whole grain over white! and when baking i usually do half white, half whole grain 🙂

    Reply

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