Best Tips to Avoid a Flabby Body From a Desk Job

flabby body

I’m an office worker; been doing office-fication for damn near 23 years now. I have a fantastic job but the longevity of desk time is worse than eating a burrito stuffed with raw hyena giblets. Much, much worse than that.

Since I pretty much sit on my ass all day, I’ve come up with a few tricks over the years to avoid flabby body syndrome due to a desk job. Come graze on these tips, shall we?

ANTI-FLAB OFFICE TIPS

1. Go Back to High School: Emmm, in spirit, that is. When you consider that high-schoolers sit on their asses for most of the day, too, what’s the one big difference separating office workers from students? Teenagers have to switch classes every 45-60 minutes. This means they get in 3-4 minutes of movement each hour as they shuffle to the next class. Those few minutes may not seem like a lot, but it adds up. So go back to high school! Stand up and do something on your feet once per hour for just a few minutes.

2. Stairwell Challenge: If you have stairwell in your office building, start at the bottom and count how many stairs to the top. Now make it a challenge: Each Monday, assign yourself a total number of steps to climb by the end of the week. In one my best weeks of stairwell climbing I managed to get in over 1,400 steps climbed. BOOM!

3. Break Room Boogie: You ready for lunch? Don’t be one of those people who gossips at the water cooler or stares at your microwave meal spinning ’round as it cooks. Instead, boogie those precious cook-time minutes away with a stretch, twist, squat or walk down the halls. Stretching my lower back with a series of forward bends is my go-to “microwave workout”. I don’t give a damn who’s looking.

4. Neck Rollerama: You can find all kinds of visual charts on the Interwebz on how to stretch in an office chair, but the golden tip that surpasses them all is the neck roll. I find the neck roll most precious because it stretches your neck while reaching down into the back muscles as well. An achy neck and back will discourage you from a workout, so keep those body parts well oiled with some rollerama as you sit in your chair. M’kay?

So ya, the point here is to keep moving. Anything to un-glue you from that office chair will help you beat the flab. Now ‘git to it.

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Workout With Me: Fitness Missions for Week of Feb 2nd, plus how I screw up my morning workout

Before we get into this week’s Fitness Missions, lemme show you what happens when I screw myself out of a morning workout. Ever been like me? Can you relate? Most times I get the fitness thang right, but here’s what happens when I get it WRONG!

FITNESS MISSIONS FOR THIS WEEK

  • Monday: 3 rounds of 10 bicep curls + 5 pushups
  • Tuesday: 3 rounds of 20 mountain climbers + 20 half jacks
  • Wednesday: 2 rounds of 10 alt reverse lunges w/arms over head (stabilize that core!)   
  • Thursday: 10 reps of jumping jack + tuck jump
  • Friday: 2 rounds of ten 180-degree jump squats ~ see video demo below

Have a GREAT week and push hard towards you goals. Because ain’t nobody else gonna do it for you.

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Weekend News Flash: Toilet Bowl Coffee Mug, Burn Victim’s Amazing Face Reconstruction and Recipes For This Weekend

Hmmm, I wasn’t sure these pictures were legit (because the transformation is so amazing), so I did some digging. And yes, this is a real situation. Zubaida Hasan from Afghanistan was 9-years-old when she suffered the accident while trying to light a kerosene heater. Her father was told to take the girl home to die, but instead, he took her to a U.S. Army base in the region to seek help. And the rest is history! I’m so happy Zubaida got her life back. See her full story on YouTube.

burn victim facial reconstruction

TOILET BOWL MUG

Ever wonder what the brown water inside your toilet actually taste like? Well here’s your chance…sorta. Behold the Toilet Bowl Coffee Mug! If you’re not interested in a cup of crap in the morning, the mug still works well as a snack dish or herb planter. Also works well as a gift for your boss on your very first day on the job.

toilet bowl mug

RECIPES I’M TRYING THIS WEEKEND

 Next Week on Yum Yucky

Dang-it! I’m still working on the Flat Abs Food Haul video I promised you. Last week’s multi-tasking skills were insufficient for completing the video task. Please do not flog me with 1,000 lashes of disappointment. Although I will accept a flogging of fresh cheesecake slices to the face. Yes???

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Exposed on Video: The Truth About Abs After Kids

Sure, I photograph well for still shots, but now I’ve put a video camera to my abs to expose the close up situation of what’s going on with my midsection.

The truth about abs after kids is that perfection is a pipe dream. It simply doesn’t exist. Instead, work hard to be better than you were yesterday.

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Workout With Me: Fitness Missions for Week of Jan 26th

workout jan 26

No isolated moves this week. We’re gonna hit the entire body! If you’re sitting on the couch, get up. Never mind that those Scooby Snacks are delicious; put the dang box down. If you want to ignore this week’s fitness missions, welp…you get out of it what you put into it.

  • Monday: 20 beach volleyball spikes ~ mimic the action of jumping up & spiking a volleyball over the net. Focus on executing every rep with power and strength. As you go for the spike, envision yourself as the badass you truly are.
  • Tuesday: 2 rounds of 25 alternating speed skaters
  • Wednesday: 15 snow shovelers on each side ~ mimic the move of shoveling heavy snow while holding light dumbbells.
  • Thursday: 20 alternating surfers ~ get into a surfer stance facing left, then jump & turn 180 degrees into surfer stance, facing right. Get those legs low!
  • Friday: 10 rounds of 1 push up + 10 half jacks. This is a circuit consisting of 10 rounds. By the end of the 10th round, you will have completed 10 pushups and 100 half jacks. It’s fat burning cardio, baby.

If you’ve been having a difficult time and struggling with your fitness, don’t try to slay a flock of Pterodactyls with one stone. This week, focus on making one healthy decision everyday. So basically, what I’m saying is, slay one Pterodactyl at a time. Ya know?

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Disclaimer: Not all exercise programs are suitable for everyone. Check with your doctor before beginning any exercise program. Neither Josie, YumYucky.com, nor anyone else associated with this website will be responsible or liable for any injury you sustain while exercising.