Medical Face Mask: Something gross happened when I wore one.

face

I don’t get sick much, but when I sat in my hair stylist’s chair, she proceeded to hack up 25 lungs in a coughing fit that left me reeling. I immediately knew I was doomed. First the convulsive sneezing started. And within 36 hours I was on the phone calling out sick from work.

I lay bedridden for awhile, drinking hot tea and watching nature shows on Discovery Channel (it’s a damn shame what those hyenas did to that cheetah).

But let’s back up a sec. My first line of defense to speed my recovery from a cold is to up my intake of oregano oil. It’s a critical step that I encourage you to try. Yet I also did something revolutionary: I donned a disposable ear loop face mask for my family’s sake.

The masks have been in my medical supply hoard since 2013. I’ve been saving them for the apocalypse, of course. But the light bulb went off inside my brain and persuaded me to use a mask right now. I pulled out a few masks in the morning before doing the daily prep of the kid’s anti-stomach flu concoction, and then I did some laundry. I looked damn sexy in that mask, but that’s neither here nor there.

And now here comes the gross part: After about an hour, all that coughing, sneezing and heavy breathing I did caused the part of the mask touching my nose and mouth to become very wet. The mask captured all that moisturized nastiness.

Disgusting, isn’t it?

Without my mask, all of those sneezes and coughs of wetness may have otherwise spewed into the air around my house. Sure, I had tissues on hand, but I doubt it would have captured those viral aerosols as well as the mask did. This got me thinking about how other people’s aerosols of grossness are in the air all around us. Nasty, nasty, nasty.

(Sidenote: I no longer go out of my way to shake hands with people. I simply don’t know where their hands have been.)

medical face mask

Who has time to be sick, right? But more importantly, I don’t want my child spawns to be ill. It’s been over a week since I did the mask trick and my gremlin children and doing well with no cold symptoms. The mask was no bother to me at all. In the midst of feeling like total crap, donning the mask gave me a bit of empowerment over the situation. It was comfortable to wear and obviously did the job I needed it to do.  

So consider this: Next time your nostrils and pie hole become a loaded gun of germ-infested ammunition, do your entire household a favor and put a mask on it.

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5 Minute Booty and Thigh Shaper Workout

It doesn’t take long to get a nice burn going in the booty and thighs. This 5 minute workout helps to shape up the lower body real nice. And we all want that for ourselves, riiight?

Booty and Thigh Shaper WORKOUT BREAKDOWN

2 rounds on each leg

There is no rest in-between each of these exercises. Do your best to go into each move with no rest to keep that shapely burn going strong!

  • 10 reps leg lift
  • 10 reps high-end leg lift pulse
  • 10 reps in & out push (at this point, you lower bod will be on fire)
  • 10 second static hold
  • now take it from the top on the same leg all over again before moving on to the next leg
  • stretch it ouuuut

I’ll keep these workout vids coming to help you reach your fitness goals. Be sure to subscribe to my Youtube channel. Now seriously. Stretch out your bootay & thighs. You gotta be sore by now. Sheesh!

butt workout

Ps. Today is my birthday. I officially turned 42 today! Yipppeeee!!!! For those of you who are concerned about turning old & crusty as the 40th year looms closer, don’t even sweat it. The fourth decade is actually pretty sweeet.

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Workout With Me: Fitness Missions for Week of Feb 16th

fitness missions feb 16

It’s official. You have just entered Kettlebell Country. If you don’t own a kettlebell, then you are in Dumbbell Country. Either way, you are all up in ‘da place — poised to burn fat and build muscle, so get ready for this week’s fitness missions.

FITNESS MISSIONS FOR THIS WEEK

  • Monday: 2 rounds of 25 Kettlebell (KB) swings + 20 pushups.
  • Tuesday: 3 rounds of 10 KB squats + 10 alternating KB reverse lunges. Hold KB at chest level.
  • Wednesday: 12 reps one-legged KB deadlift (each leg) + 10 tuck jumps
  • Thursday: 3 rounds of 10 burpees + 5 KB swings + 20 mountain climbers.
  • Friday: 3 rounds of 10 KB squats + 10 sec hold KB overhead (be careful!)

Funk up your armpits real sweaty. Get your body nice and sore. Eat clean with just a little bit of greedy nibbles. Now repeat and repeat and repeat. This is a formula that leads to weight loss.

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Hey Girl: Valentine’s Day Fitness Romance

hey girl

Part 1: The Uncomfortable Introduction

Katy Andersen walked into Broad Street Gym and made a beeline for the locker room. Against her better judgement, she donned a pair of pink shorts with a white stripe on the side of each hip. Sure, they were cute, but the sizing was off — too small. Not only did it make the ride to the gym uncomfortable, a massive wedgie had now risen up to claim its rightful place digging up her backside.

This was Katy’s fate for having a Netflix marathon and baking muffins and on laundry day instead of taking the time to wash gym clothes that actually fit.

Ugh, why did I wear these shorts, she thought to herself. Just like her ex, the shorts were a big mistake. Thank God her winter coat concealed the atrocity as an emergency pair of capris waited in her gym bag.

“Katy? Excuse me…is it Katy?” an unknown voice called out from behind her in the main hallway of the building. As she turned around to see who it was, the wedgie dug deeper with a one-two punch to the butt crack.

The man calling her name was now in a slow jog to catch up to her. Katy had never seen this guy at the gym before. She did a quick assessment and determined him to be 6-foot-sexy. He wore black Adidas track pants and a gray tank top that showed off his muscular arms and shoulders. This mystery man had an athletic frame — definitely her type of guy.

“I see you’re into porn?” the man asked with a smirk on his face.

“Excuse me?” Katy spoke in a calm, yet firm tone with a stern look on her face. The man’s attractiveness did not grant him a free pass for disrespect. Katy was ready and willing to crush his man-jewels with a kick to the crotch if the offenses continued.

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry. Food porn. I meant food porn,” he said as he demonstrated the international body language for I am an idiot: a self-induced smack to the forehead.

Continue reading…

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Knockoff! Olive Garden Chicken and Gnocchi Soup Recipe

olive garden chicken gnocchi soup

This is a real belly-pleaser. I promise. It only takes about 30 minutes to make a large pot that serves about 7-8 hungry beasts.

I’m just gonna go ahead and say it — my version of Olive Garden Chicken and Gnocchi Soup Recipe is better than going to the restaurant to grab a bowl. This is the my 4th winter of cooking up this bowl of deliciousness, and the whole family loves it. My adaption is “souped-up” by the addition of more thyme and the introduction of rosemary to the recipe.

GATHER YOUR INGREDIENTS

  • 6 cups chicken stock, or use Herb Ox bullion packets to create the broth — no MSG!
  • 3 cups light cream
  • 4 cooked chicken breasts, cubed or pulled into small pieces. I boiled my breasts in broth. Just sayin’.
  • 1 to 1.5 packages gnocchi (in the pasta aisle)
  • 1.5 cups raw spinach
  • 4-5 dashes of thyme
  • 1 tsp. rosemary
  • sprinklings of pepper

NOW LET’S GET ‘TA COOKING!

  1. Prepare cooked breasts and set aside. If you boiled your breasts, you may be able to use some of the left over broth for the soup.
  2. Add broth and light cream to large pot.
  3. Slowly add thyme, rosemary and pepper to taste. If using dried rosemary, smash it into smaller pieces with your fingers before throwing into the pot. Allow spices to marinate with a slow simmer for approx 15 minutes.
  4. Adjust the texture of the soup by adding more broth or cream depending on desired consistency. Broth will make it lighter, cream will make it thicker.
  5. Add gnocchi and continue cooking for approximately 10 minutes. You can opt for the mini gnocchi I used, as pictured, or use the standard size gnocchi.
  6. While the gnocchi cooks, cut fresh spinach into small pieces and add to the pot.
  7. Add your cooked chicken to the pot last.
  8. Now SLURP

olive garden chicken gnocchi recipe

There was actually an argument in my house about who was going to get the last bowl. If you desire increased arguments and soup-factions to rise up in your home, go ahead and make this soup immediately.

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Disclaimer: Not all exercise programs are suitable for everyone. Check with your doctor before beginning any exercise program. Neither Josie, YumYucky.com, nor anyone else associated with this website will be responsible or liable for any injury you sustain while exercising.