Pure Nastiness: Pancake House Edition

So we went to the pancake house and it was Pure Nastiness. Well, ya. It was a few years back, but so what?

I am scarred for life.

Especially since that daggone pancake house is right near the grocery store. Every time I’m running low on raccoon seasoning I am forced to drive by that dang IHOP to get to the supermarket.

And I see other people going into the pancake house. And I wonder…what the hell is their problem?

This Is What Happened….

Me and the husband were stomach-growling simultaneously. We only had two children at the time (woo hoo!) and neither of them was with us, so we decided to head to the IHOP to have breakfast for dinner.

Then everything went wrong, like when I buy all the salad makings for a meal, except I forget to get the lettuce.

There were many signs to turn back, but our overwhelming hungry short-circuited the warning sensors and caused us to go stupid.

  • FAIL #1: There was only one other customer in the whole restaurant.
  • FAIL #2: There were two large flies buzzing over our head.
  • FAIL #3: A semi-toothless man greeted us and explained he was our server AND our cook.
  • FAIL #4: We didn’t get up and leave.
  • FAIL #5: Cook-server came to our table to shoot the breeze while the food was cooking.
  • FAIL #6: The damn flies!
  • FAIL #7: We stayed and ate the food.

Surprisingly, the food wasn’t too bad. But the flies and the toothless man were too much to endure. Why the hell did we stay?

I don’t know what we were thinking. I just remember being REALLY hungry and desperate to eat. I drive by that place now and see other people going in. Maybe their warning sensors are broke just like ours were?

This is a Pure Nastiness public service announcement. Do not endure the strange and putrid just to get a meal.

Have YOU ever suffered Pure Nastiness at a restaurant?



  1. Haha! No pure nastiness, but I avoid pancake houses at all costs unless it’s 2 AM, in which case it’s very entertaining :)

  2. JC says:

    heh. reminds me of the last time I ate at a McDonalds located in a truck stop!

  3. Have I ever! I could write a book on this. How about this one — the wrapped silverware still has butter on it from the previous customer! Yes, you could have wiped it off with a napkin, but some person thought it was okay to rewrap in a napkin and set it on a table. Crazy! Can you believe I still ate there? I haven’t realized how bad that sounds until now. :-)

  4. Miz says:

    I have no comment.
    we would never ever ever have our local IHOP as part of our sunday morning routine.

    **slinks off**

  5. Ugh! I would have had to leave. And if the toothless dude looked anything like that picture up there, I would have cried.

  6. Natalia says:

    Oh yeah!  We stopped at a Waffle House one time.  OMGsh it was the grossest place ever.  Dirty, greasy, flies buzzing around, no running water (isn’t that illegal).  So everyone that came out of the bathroom couldn’t have washed their hands, INCLUDING the people handling our food.  UGH!  I cringe every time I drive by that place!  

  7. YIKES, that is as scary as that pic!!!! Nope, have not gone thru that but you were friggin brave!

  8. Eunice says:

    Bahaha I love this post, Yucky!

    When I was in Costa Rica, there was an outside buffet and the flies were ALL OVER THE PLACE. On the food, on the plates, on the people. I don’t know. I just don’t know how anyone ate there. Ugh, bad memories.

  9. Erin says:

    I’ve never had that happen to me in a IHOP but I had the worst server in the world in a Red Lobster. I didn’t get my dinner for over han hour and a half! 😛

  10. marzipan says:

    YES! And I am scarred!! Last year, the night before I came down with swine flu, I was craving a meatball sub SO I walked down the cold street to a local pizza place to get said sub. However, it was eerily quiet in there and when I went to pay, I looked down and the chef (also counter guy) was wearing FLIP FLOPS while he was cooking and he had literally the longest most disgusting toe nails I’ve ever seen.

    And then I got swine flu. Toenail related? Unlikely. Forever connected in my mind? Yeah I won’t be eating there again. ever.

  11. I can’t say I ever had a really horrible experience like that but I have been to plenty of places that I wouldn’t go back. Also, congrats on getting the gym membership! That is going to be FUN! :)

  12. I’ll tell you what, this one time I went to Arby’s and the lady taking my order had a full on beard. Not like, a little facial hair, like Grizzly Adams type stuff. Now hair and food do not mix well with me AT ALL so when I saw her I nearly turned and ran (waddled) right out that door. Only problem was that I saw that mountain of roast beef on the menu board and I didn’t know how to say no. I ordered from Ms. Yak Woman. It was a sad day in the life of the no bacon man.

  13. Christine says:

    Our local IHOP has equal nastiness. Too bad. Breakfast is yummy.

    (And another sidenote-rant: When the hell did IHOP start putting cream cheese on everything? The last time I was there I wanted a freaking pancake with fresh strawberries and some SF whipped cream. Instead I got strawberries in a thick sugary glaze coated in preservatives, complete with some kind of cream cheese/whipped cream/butter crap on top. Too sweet, too thick, and a total diet-buster. What the heck???)

  14. LOL! I took my son to IHOP once and SEVERAL tables of elderly people were coughing up some nasty stuff. It turned my stomach. Seriously, if you are sick, shouldn’t you be home resting instead of eating some cream cheese and strawberry stuffed pancakes?

  15. Joe says:

    Pancake House. You from the South?

  16. Jess says:

    Well…I have never suffered pure nastiness in a restaurant, but street vendors, especially in Asia, have THE BEST food. And naturally, there are flies, cockroaches, trash, and things that would not be considered Grade A in America around. Still, worth it because the food is BOMB. And cheap. But let me emphasize again. DELICIOUS.

    Speaking of which, most authentic Chinese restaurants in the US have a grade of usually B or C and are still packed. Noms :)

  17. Pocket says:

    don’t want to laugh but I have to. The toothless man at the door would of been enough to walk away. I had one Pure Nastiness, was at this burger joint and the blue cheese for the wings looked bad when we told the waitress she dipped a carrot in it, stirred it around and said it looked good to her.

  18. merri says:

    Umm ya..ive been to some pretty gross restaurants before. I think most ihops, bickfords, and the like are like that. And ive eaten at them. Sometimes I was a kid and couldn’t help it. Sometimes I was a young adult and didn’t know better, or was too drunk to care. More recently, ive been in some gross (as in both dirty, and selling food that was fat, blood clots, hooves and the like) authentic chinese restaurants at my last house, because its all they had around there. Ew. Ew. Ew.

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