Holla-holla! We are pleased to introduce a cutting edge new treatment for all the peoples who want to shed the fat without putting in any effort.
Electric Collar Shock Therapy!
This neck collar weight loss aid has dual action. Together will a microscopic chip implanted at the base of your skull, the chip sends a high voltage electrical pulse signal to the collar at the very first thought of greediness or excessive laziness.
With each and every therapeutic shock, the wearer becomes trained to eat reasonable portions and get off their azz to be active. Wearer may receive as much as 10 shocks in the very first hour of treatment, so this proves that its fast acting.
Paid Testimonials
- “I use it everday! The smell of burning neck flesh is nothing to complain about, considering I’ve already lost 25 pounds in 3 days!” ~ Jill from Wisconsin
- “Well worth the price. My chip implantation incision is only infected a little bit now. I’ll be done this 3rd round of antibiotics in no time.” ~ Harry from Detroit
Buy your Electric Shock Collar today!
Here’s How To Order
- Send $2,589 (cash and wires transfers only)
- Allow 12-18 months for shipment.
- Shipments lost in transit are your own problem.
- No refunds or exchanges allowed.
- Limited time offer. Act now!
Diss-claimer: Just like Big Pharma, we are not responsible for botched surgeries during chip implantation, charred flesh due to excessive electrical wattage, rash or irritation, and sudden death.
The Mr. doesn’t need to lose weight, but I think he needs this collar anyway.
The spikes are very stylish!
Very punk rock, indeed.
Does the shock collar come in multiple colors? Then I could coordinate the collar with all of my outfits.
Twitter: YumYucky
says:
no go. Fat-So, Inc. picks the color for you. The color that clashes most with your outfit.
omg your crazy……….
Twitter: YumYucky
says:
hey, look everybody. It’s my Auntie Chari! sweeeeeeeee! I love my Auntie.
I assume it comes in a one-size-fits-none variety? I’ll take 6!
You’re too damn hilarious!
Hmmm I’ll take two. One for me for after Sam comes to get me out of some of some food cravings (shhh don’t tell my nutritionist I had 2 servings of ice cream yesterday, my bad). And one for hubby!
Mmmm. I think I’ll be hiding from it while I eat my sugar…Because I’m back on sugar. At least till the next weigh in. Jealous?
Twitter: YumYucky
says:
Why don’t you just bathe in a tub of sugar sludge instead?
This is genius, you could run around and throw them at unsuspecting people in a mad act of hoopla. I know that might be a little cruel. But both parties would benefit I’m sure.
Hungry Jenny x
Check’s in the mail…
Twitter: YumYucky
says:
Excuse me, but I don’t take checks.
Money order?
is it weird that this pic turns me on?
Twitter: YumYucky
says:
Coming from you? No, completely normal.
you crack me up!
(and what do you normally use that collar for?!)
Twitter: YumYucky
says:
no comment
Twitter: truth2beingfit
says:
Crap, don’t give those money slime balls out there any ideas Josie!!! People fall for way too many crack pot schemes! I bet they are sending money your way right now!!!
You are tooooooooooooooooooooo funny!
I would love to have one when I get into my binging moods.
LOL the sad thing is that I thought it could be for real for a minute! Goes to show you that society will dp pretty much anything to lose weight. It would not surprise me if someone tries to order it LMAO
ooooh Ill take one as well.
it shall make me look REALLY HARD OF CORE!
That’s funny stuff. I have, in fact, put one of these on to prove to some friends they weren’t as bad for a dog as everyone thinks. Bull – It hurts like hell. May keep me out of my kids Easter candy next year.
-Joe
Yes! Sign me up. I also want to lose 25 pounds in 3 days.
you crack me up!
(and what do you normally use that collar for?!)
very good idea.